World's oldest dog The oldest dog ever on records was an Australian cattle-dog. He was famous all over the world by the name of Bluey. He left this world only after crossing the age of 29.

Dog Jokes

  • Q: Why was the hungry dog holding his tail?
  • A: He was trying to make both ends meet!
  • Q: What is the favourite destination of a dog?
  • A: New Yorkie!
  • Q: Who is the dogs favorite comedian?
  • A: Growlcho Marx!
  • Q: What's expected if the dog went to the flea circus?
  • A: He stole the show!
  • Q: Why does the poodle bite the woman's ankle?
  • A: Because he was short and couldn't reach any higher!
  • Q: Where do Eskimos train their dogs?
  • A: In the mush room!
  • Q: Why does the snowman named his dog Frost?
  • Because frost bites!
  • Q: When will a stray dog walk into your house?
  • A: When the door is open!
  • Q: Why don't dogs make good dancers?
  • A: Because they have two left feet!
  • What is the favorite sport of a dog?
  • A: Formula 1 drooling!
  • Q: What do you get if you take a large dog out for a walk?
  • A: A Great Dane out!
  • Q: Where does a Rottweiller usually sit in the cinema?
  • A: Anywhere it wants to!
  • Q: Which breed of dog a Dracula will most likely to have?
  • A: A bloodhound!
  • Q: What is a dog's favorite food?
  • A: Everything on your plate!
  • Q: Which type of dog would you like to eat?
  • A: A hot dog!
  • Q: What kind of dog sounds like you can eat it?
  • A sausage dog!
  • Q: What happens when it rains cats and dogs?
  • A: You can step in a poodle!
  • Q: What happens to the dog whose favorite food was garlic?
  • A: His bark was much worse than it's bite!
  • Q: What is the most loved flower of a dog?
  • A: Anything in your garden!
  • Q: What dog wears contact lenses?
  • A: A cock-eyed spaniel!
  • Q: What's a dog favorite hobby?
  • A: Collecting fleas!
  • Q: What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
  • A: That hit the spots!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a hyena?
  • A: I don't know but I'll join in if it laughs!
  • Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat?
  • A: Cats can't drive!
  • Q: What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy road?
  • A: A mutt in a rut!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a dog with a blind mole?
  • A: A dog that keeps barking up the wrong tree!
  • Q: What do you call a happy Lassie?
  • A: A jolly collie!
  • Q: What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?
  • A: A dingo-ling!
  • Q: What dog loves to take bubble baths?
  • A: A shampoodle!
  • Q: How do you catch a runaway dog?
  • A: Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a bone!
  • Q: What dogs are best for sending telegrams?
  • A: Wire haired terriers!!
  • Q: What kind of dog does a vampire prefer?
  • A: Any kind of bloodhound!
  • Q: What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers?
  • A: A bud hound!
  • What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog?
  • A: Chump chops!
  • Q: How many seasons are there in a dogs life?
  • A: Just one, the moulting season!
  • Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
  • A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he still won't come!
  • Q: Why is it called a "litter" of puppies?
  • A: Because they mess up the whole house!
  • Q: How do you stop a dog smelling?
  • A: Put a peg on it's nose!
  • Q: What is the best time to take a Rottweiler for a walk?
  • A: Any times he wants to!
  • Q: When is a black dog not a black dog?
  • A: When it's a greyhound!
  • Q: What do you get if cross two young dogs with a pair of headphones?
  • A: Hush puppies!
  • Q: What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?
  • A: Slush puppies!
  • What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?
  • A: Cockerpoodledoo!
  • Q: What do you call a sheepdog's tail that can tell tall stories?
  • A: A shaggy dogs tale!
  • Q: Why do dogs run in circles?
  • A: Because its hard to run in squares!
  • Q: How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster?
  • A: Terrier-fied!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a gun dog with a telephone?
  • A: A golden receiver!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?
  • A: Dingo Starr!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly?
  • A: The collie wobbles!
  • Q: What do you call a black Eskimo dog?
  • A: A dusky husky!
  • What happens to a dog that keeps eating bits off of the table?
  • A: He gets splinters in his mouth!
  • Q: What kind of dog chases anything red?
  • A: A bull dog!
  • Q: What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?
  • A: A guard dog!
  • Q: What do you call a dog in jeans and a sweater?
  • A: A plain clothes police dog!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a dog and a skunk?
  • A: Rid of the dog!
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a computer and a Rottweiller?
  • A: A computer with a lot of bites!





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